Babies, Booze & Boobs

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Writer’s Daughter Won’t F*cking Sleep, So He Wrote a Book About It


Novelist Adam Mansbach apparently can’t get his 2-year-old daughter to get the fuck to sleep. Inspired by his toddler’s affinity to delay shut eye with requests for water, going tinkle or a different stuffed animal to snuggle with, he authored Go the F#ck to Sleep, a book intended for adults with the look and feel of a children’s book.

Mansbach told TODAY Moms that he hopes “the book is very reflective of what we all feel putting our kids to bed.”

And so he wrote:

“The cats nestle close to their kittens.
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear
Please go the f@#k to sleep.”

Parents obviously will identify with Mansbach’s sentiment, and if they don’t, they’re lying. While The Boy is a tremendous sleeper, and rarely pulls the stunts Manbach’s little princess does, there’s something great about shutting the door to your kid’s room. It’s like stepping out of the rain into a room warmed by a flickering fire place. It’s like a smooth glass of whiskey after a hellacious day at the office. The escape of the maddening mind of a toddler can never be overrated.

But if one is going to drop the f-bomb in the title of a book aimed at disheartened parents, I have plenty of better suggestions:

Shut the F#CK Up

Stop Pissing on the F#cking Floor

Eat Your F#cking Food

I Got Sh*t on My Hands Again

No, We Are Not Going to Watch Toy Story for the 1,346th Time, You F#ck Nut

Say No Again and I’ll Slap Your F#cking Face

Your Brother and Sister are Asleep – Don’t F#cking Wake Them

While commentors over at Parent Dish are aghast by Mansbach’s book, which some thing signfies the start of Revelations and the end times, I think it’s important to recognize something important: he said please. Hooray for politeness!


2 responses to “Writer’s Daughter Won’t F*cking Sleep, So He Wrote a Book About It

  1. Howard Christian 05/03/2011 at 6:56 pm

    you are my f**king hero!!

  2. Pingback: » Writer’s Daughter Won’t F*cking Sleep, So He Wrote a Book About It « Babies, Booze & Boobs » Offers limitless

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